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That’s Life©1966 #435 (11-2-12)

Ted Hickman weekly newspaper column and post from his web page at www.tedhickman.com

Free to Email:Tedhick@gmail.com

 

I’m writing a book about reverse psychology, please don’t buy it.

 

The Election

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Email…Ted: My lab is guarding the sign on my front yard to make sure one of your opponents don't sabotage it…J.B. Dixon 

            Next Tuesday is the big day for our city. We have a mayor and two new city council seats to fill. The Mayor’s seat gives a stark difference in substance, style and leadership between the two serious candidates. In the race for the two open city council seats you have at least four candidates with which you can’t go wrong.  I am factually the most qualified to earn a seat. I've been elected three times before and served four years each in the 60’s, 70's and 80's...10 years as a council person and two as vice mayor…before I retired for a spell. Here are just some of my credentials that can be documented:

  • Co-founded Dixon Little league, arranged for the Little League fields to be built and a long term lease secured and served in every capacity in LL for years from president to head umpire on down…before we had kids.
  • Wife Linda was one of the first female board members and coaches, while I served as head referee, and coached for Dixon Soccer. Again Linda was one of the first female board members and female coaches.
  • I became a certified soccer referee and then worked up to state level ref and ref instructor. Ref'ed more than 3,000 games from youth, to high school, to college and adult competitive. All four family members became certified refs and coaches.
  • I/we volunteered at the Dixon May Fair for decades working with both 4-H and FFA with the junior live stock auction. As a NAA instructor we taught archery and fire arm safety at 4-H camps.
  • We have volunteered with Lambtown and most other community events for decades.
  • We had two offspring attend Dixon schools from kindergarten thru graduation. All four grandchildren now attend Dixon schools.
  • Worked with junior and high school band, soccer, baseball, wrestling, golf,..and the Dixon Dolphins Swim team…the list goes on and on.
  • I have received dozens of awards/commendations for volunteer/community/business work including Dixon’s Citizen of the Year. You have kids? We can relate to and understand most everything in which you will become involved.
  • I just recently served another two years as a Vice Commander with the Dixon American Legion Post 208 and a few years ago on the Solano County Grand Jury.
  • We may best known for the 45+ years of running the seven part, private, (no government involvement or funding) all volunteer, $15,000 a year Dixon Toys for Tots programs where we help over 350 families, between 700 and 800 kids, over 100 seniors, have a brighter holiday season. Several hundred volunteers help with this program each year including the fire and police department personnel. Asst. Fire Chief Ron Karlen and a few members of the fire department help with the bike program and Ron and his wife and a few others buy all of the toys with our donated funds. Elaine Perry at the Police Department  helps coordinate the coat program.
  • Then there’s the past. It was my work that saw Northwest Park become a park/overflow drainage instead of solid houses. Look at the names on the City Hall plaque. The Police Department, Senior Center and early solar usage all have my name attached to them in the records for years of work to see them through to completion…etc.
  • I’m supposed to be enjoying retirement and I still have my real estate license but have pared it down to help military/vets and those who have trouble buying homes. I also manage the family’s properties and ranch and we still have the Outdoor Connection hunting/fishing business booking agency where we arrange for adventures all over the world.
  • My last wife Linda and I have walked to several thousand houses OURSELVES to deliver my message. Don’t know who to vote for? Let me give you a hint…ME!  You have a favorite in the race, please vote for them and give me your second vote…that’s fair enough huh?

            We haven’t heard any personal negatives. We’ve run into Jack Batchelor several times and he’s the only other one I’ve seen or know of who’s delivering his own message personally. It’s a lot of work to visit this many homes and talk to people along the way but what a neat experience just seeing the different homes, landscaping and to smell the different gardens and cooking.

We were having lunch the Monday when Mike Ceremello dropped in on us. He said he thinks people are going to be “really surprised” with the outcome of the election. He said he has heard people won’t vote for me because of things in this column…like blond jokes…but they’ll vote for him?  I hope people are able to separate what I’ve done for the community from the informative/entertaining aspects of this column.

You probably don’t know (or care) I don’t get paid to write this column, for the features or photos. I have been writing this piece every week for 8.36 years, without missing even one week as a favor to the publisher, Dave Scholl. I started writing for him back when he was critically ill…Anyway I hope no one withholds a vote or doesn’t vote for me because of something that has appeared in this space. I only write half or less of it each week. The rest comes from the 50 to 100 emails I get 24-7 from all over…I just share the blame for printing some of the borderline stuff…but much of it is funny!

 

           

Time Changes

 

            Looks like Saturday night most of the nation will set their clocks back one hour because…I don’t know why. Because we are a nation of sheep? Stupid as it is now days you either do it or be an hour late for everything until spring when the dumb ritual will take place to return the time to how it should be….or is it right now and we mess it up in the spring…who knows?

 

Sleep In The Barn…

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Jack decided to go skiing with his buddy, Bob. So they loaded up Jack's minivan and headed north. After driving for a few hours, they got caught in a terrible blizzard. So they pulled into a nearby farm and asked the attractive lady who answered the door if they could spend the night.

'I realize its terrible weather out there and I have this huge house all to myself, but I'm recently widowed,' she explained. 'I'm afraid the neighbors will talk if I let you stay in my house.' 'Don't worry,' Jack said... 'We'll be happy to sleep in the barn. And if the weather breaks, we'll be gone at first light.' The lady agreed, and the two men found their way to the barn and settled in for the night. Come morning, the weather had cleared, and they got on their way. They enjoyed a great weekend of skiing. 

But about nine months later, Jack got an unexpected letter from an attorney. It took him a few minutes to figure it out, but he finally determined that it was from the attorney of that attractive widow he had met on the ski weekend...He dropped in on his friend Bob and asked, "Bob, do you remember that good-looking widow from the farm we stayed at on our ski holiday up north about 9 months ago?" "Yes, I do." Said Bob...”Did you, er, happen to get up in the middle of the night, go up to the house and pay her a visit?"

 "Well, um, yes!" Bob said, a little embarrassed about being found out, 'I have to admit that I did." "And did you happen to give her my name instead of telling her your name?" Bob's face turned beet red and he said, "Yeah, look, I'm sorry, buddy. I'm afraid I did.' 'Why do you ask?"…"She just died and left me everything."  (And you thought the ending would be different, didn't you? you know you smiled...now keep that smile for the rest of the day!)

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Next week: Yea, yahoo, no more political carp (remember the publisher won’t let me use the word crap).

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